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Why Millennials Are Ditching Tinder to Hook Up on Reddit

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Thank you for adding to the vibrancy of the OkCupid community. An online dating site that's open and welcoming to even the quirkiest singles and embraces differences and variety of its users should be a given — not a bonus.


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Unfortunately, a lot of OkCupid's competitors have some growing up to do. If you're feeling hopeless about finding love at all, you won't be after being on OkCupid. I literally had likes after having my profile up for two days. OkCupid has such a massive user base with such a wide variety of people, there's no way you're not gonna find a ton of people who find you exactly their type.

The app has that standard swiping app feel but less "I'm judging you solely on your face" vibes. You see one profile at a time and swipe right or left depending on whether or not you're interested, with random profile-building questions thrown in at times to narrow down your pickings even more. If you want more freedom to peruse the dating pool, the discover section is also available like it is on the desktop version. See what potential matches are talking about, search for names, or even type in a hobby, musical artist, or show to see which users near you mentioned the same thing.

It's chill and simple enough to do while you're waiting in line at the store or sitting on the train, all while feeling more sincere than Tinder. OkCupid recently removed open messaging, meaning randoms can no longer message you before you two have matched. This can be good or bad depending on how you prefer the conversation to start: I personally enjoy it, as one main problem with online dating in general is that ladies get harassed by men who flood their inboxes.

It's genuinely overwhelming and I'd prefer to only be messaged by people I already gave the go-ahead to. Bumble tried to combat this by only letting women message first. Like me, some people were stoked on this. Reddit user reciphered writes:. I send fewer messages and I receive higher quality responses.

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I believe this is all because of the requirement to match before messaging. Now women are required to seek out desirable profiles in order to interact with users on the site - just like the men. I also really like how doubletake has shown me interesting profiles that I wouldn't have found with browsing. The only downside is the low population compared to Tinder. I assumed that only annoyingly persistent men would dislike this change, but according to Reddit, a lot of ladies also aren't feeling it either:.

I either have to "like" people fairly indiscriminately to leave myself open to conversation, or I have to close doors on potential conversation that could be worthwhile. I was doing just fine having the block feature, or simply not responding to people who weren't worth my time. Luckily, OkCupid's DoubleTake profile allows you to see a good amount of info on a person before you swipe, so you're not about to match with people blindly more on that later.

If the closed messaging is the most annoying thing on the site, that's pretty good.

Why Millennials Are Ditching Tinder to Hook Up on Reddit

If you're not getting the attention and messages you think you deserve, there's an option to boost your profile to get you a full day's worth of activity in just 15 minutes. The Reddit community is actually huge on OkCupid, and while all dating sites receive their fair share of shit Redditors do not hold back on giving their opinions , I genuinely feel like OkCupid has the most nice things said about it.

Or the least mean things. This blog even put together a guide on OkCupid advice that Redditors have given over the past few years. The site is basically fully functional with the free membership, and we give them props for that. Most dating sites make you pay to do literally anything besides signing up. However, if you're feeling ambitious and want a little feature upgrade, OkCupid does offer two paid memberships: Those prices won't set you back nearly as much as another site would, and I like that you're able to test out the site for free before deciding to go all in.

You'll have to subscribe to the A-List for more in-depth features, but the fee isn't steep at all. One bomb free feature is Double Take. Released in , Double Take acts as a kind of insurance. It uses what you filled out in your "Looking for" section and tries to send you new people that they think match up with your ideal boo. It's a clutch way to discover profiles you wouldn't have found just by browsing, and it gives more info and more pictures than regular matches show to give you an extra deep look into what they have to offer.

On the other hand, paying for an account can get rid of ads, allow you to see people who have liked you before you like them, see read receipts, get automatic boosts, and more. This is the place for pretty much everyone who takes dating seriously, but still wants to have fun. Though OkCupid's advertisements may have "DTF" plastered all over them, the site's intentions and matchmaking process are no joke.

It might take some time and genuine effort to make a profile, but that's what you want if you're looking for something real. You'll fill out a questionnaire with your answers as well as what you would like your ideal match to answer. This makes the application-building process a lot more fun than other apps, making it feel like an online quiz. It asks a range of questions, from simple stuff to whether you smoke and drink to more intimate things like how many dates you typically wait before sleeping with someone. The app says that the more questions you answer, the better your matches will be.

The deeper you go, the more accurate your profile is. In turn, OkCupid will have a way easier time finding matches for you. Like we said in our eharmony review , just because you're bored with Tinder doesn't mean eharmony or a site with the same expectation to settle down is the next step. A lot of those users are older, divorced, and have kids, and there's a much slimmer selection of young people in that gray area.

OkCupid seems ideal for the person who's trying to marry the next person they date, even if they idea of marriage and kids makes them slightly nauseated. The LGBTQ community finally has a safe space in the online dating world that is, one that's not a super niche lesbian or gay-only app , and those who usually vote liberally can make sure they're not going on a date with someone whom they'd want to fight on Facebook.

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Get with the times, people. OkCupid also has a sick blog where they discuss social issues, success stories, local events, showcase statistics from their users, and more. It's a great way for the makers behind the screen to get connected with the people using their site, and makes OkCupid feel less like just another dating app that wants to make money.

Some people seem to be using OkCupid like Tinder and were only visiting, while most will specify exactly what they're looking for in their bios, so confusion about intentions should be minimal. It's serious, but not serious. And then there's the political aspect of it. While most dating sites refuse to take sides, OkCupid has made it clear that they care about social justice issues.

That's not to say that it's not worth a shot, but if you're trying to cast your net as wide as possible, another site where these issues aren't highlighted may give you better luck. As with any dating site, there will be the one-star ratings, enthusiastically negative reviews, and complaints from people about things that the site itself has no control over.

No, Karen, it is not OkCupid's fault that John ghosted you. Dead profiles, catfishing, and getting abruptly suspended is annoying. OkCupid has its fair share of each, but unfortunately, it's nearly impossible to guarantee that a site is completely free of flaws. OkCupid does try to combat fake profiles by having users connect an Instagram account, which is way harder to fake than an online dating profile. Cities are overflowing with users, but less populated areas see a huge drop in potential matches.

One thing that is a legitimate issue is the user base in less-populated areas. Cities like NYC, where I live are overflowing with potential boos, but I guarantee that if I logged on in my middle-of-nowhere hometown, my number of matches within a mile mile radius would drop an alarming amount. For those who have been using the site for years, they've noticed a significant slowdown with finding people to talk to, as you can't see who's messaged you until you like them back, and going through all of the possible people already takes forever.

It's easier to just block people if you don't want their messages instead of almost never being messaged at all, you know? OkCupid falls under both the classic dating site category and the swiping app category, which also means that they have way more competition than most one-or-the-other platforms do. When it comes to swiping apps, Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge are the obvious top three competitors. None of them want to be known as as hookup app, and it's definitely possible to find a long-term relationship on any of them, but Tinder and Bumble provide so little information that user intentions are easy to surmise.

Alternatively, Hinge calls itself "The Relationship App" and requires users to be a bit more serious with their pickings by judging off more than a few selfies. Where Hinge may fall short is the fact that it pretty much caters to young people only, while OkCupid is more wide-ranging.

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